July 29, 2005
In it for the Long Haul
Last night I had a dream that my husband went insane. Ok, so I know that sounds silly, as dreams often are, but this one was so realistic. In the dream, I remember my heart just breaking at the thought of my strong, amazing husband no longer being my rock. Besides God, this is who I most depend on, but in the dream, he was irrational, pitiful, and really out of his mind. I watched him being committed and I visited him while he was away and although my heart was breaking, my love never ceased. I held him and prayed that he would return to the way he used to be, and when the doctors said he probably wouldn't, I decided to stay with him because no matter what, I love this man.
Ok, so my ridiculous, completely fictional dream was not the same thing as really experiencing "tough times," but it got me thinking. When it comes to marriage, most people subconsciously are not in it for the long haul. We say "til death do us part" but what we really mean is forever and always IF he doesn't cheat, gain 200 pounds, lose his job and allow me to work my ass off supporting the family, or if I don't meet someone better. blah, blah, blah. I believe that there are circumstances where divorce is what's best, so don't think I'm against it no matter what. I'm not. I've known some committed people who tried everything. I believe that God wouldn't want us to live in an abusive situation for example, and there are other situations. But I think we are too quick to call it quits and statistics show this. Divorce has become a quick fix. What does "til death do us part" really mean? What situations actually should be deal-breakers?
After my dream last night, I got to thinking about something I read recently. Divorce rates are up and marriage rates are down. When did we lose faith in marriage? I expect hard times to come in my marriage, it's only natural, but I can tell you one thing. I love my husband with all my heart, and unless something horrible and completely unlikely happened, I'm staying. I believe in marriage and I'm in it for the long haul.
Posted by Hannah at July 29, 2005 01:53 PMMy opinion might not have any credibility because I am not married, but... I am with you 99% on this. The only part of this that i disagree on is the cheating. I will NEVER stay around for that and I have told Marc that numerous times. I saw my what my mom went through and after the first time my dad cheated she stuck through it and still put everything into their marriage, but it doesn't end. Once you cheat, it makes it easier the next time. Oh, and you know how she found out the first time he cheated?? He passed her an STD.
On to a lighter note...Isn't it WIERD how dreams can be! I love that in your dream you stayed by his side and loved him through it all. Ya'll make a great couple!
Posted by: Allison at July 29, 2005 03:37 PMi think you guys make a really good couple, and it's very obvious from our interactions :) i'm with you on this one. i can't imagine my life without mike, i know it's possible but i won't want that.
Posted by: stef at August 1, 2005 11:50 AMGreat Post
Posted by: willow at August 2, 2005 08:44 AM