Teatopia

babies, birthing, and potty training!

Things have calmed down, finally. I'm enjoying the busyness of the holiday season-- finally got all my stuff mailed! I've been busy wrapping gifts, which is next to impossible with a toddler "helping" and also helping out my mom. She's improving a little each day, but still has a ways to go.

I'm most enjoying feeling little kicks and flutters as I go about my day, but it's also kind of freaking me out. Those of you who have more than one child need to reassure me that I'm not crazy for having another and I'll be able to handle. As Olivia gets older and more difficult-- but not in a bad way-- I'm wondering how I'll manage two of them. And I still have all those fears about loving another one as much. James gets upset whenever I express this concern because in his mind, why wouldn't I love another just as much? But I don't think he understands how it is for the mother. He doesn't have the same bond I share with Olivia. A Daddy's role is a bit different I think. She grew in MY tummy, came out of MY body, nursed from ME for 18 months. I can't imagine nursing another one that isn't Olivia. Is that weird? I feel guilty already for not being able to play "horsey" and have Olivia bouncing on my tummy.

Speaking of the new baby, I loved "The Business of Being Born" and it struck a chord in me because I related so much to it. Although I had a "typical" birth the first time, there were so many things I wasn't happy with. They made me push the second I was dilated completely, and being 10 cm does not mean you are ready to push. I never even had the urge. I think because they made me push earlier than I was ready for, it caused them to have to use the vacuum and cut me to make room not once, but twice. Had my body been ready, I might've been better at pushing her out on my own and I might not have all these bladder problems. I didn't like that I was stuck in bed because it's a proven fact that you need to move around to help the baby pass through the pelvis. They wouldn't let me drink water. I couldn't have a birth plan, which meant I had no say in anything. I don't want that again. I want freedom to be an active part of the process and not a bystander. So, I have decided to go with a certified nurse midwife, who is a nurse practitioner, but also a midwife. She works with an OBGYN practice, so if I needed a doctor, I'd have one available. It feels right. I think I'd like to try to birth naturally this time, so I am going to take a Bradley course. I think epidurals are great if that's what you want, and if I end up with one, that's ok, but I want to try to do it another way this time.

Oh!!! Guess what? We have a little potty trainee! She has initiated it all on her own and has successfully tee-teed on the potty twice. The first time was a couple nights ago. She decided to sit on her potty before her bath, and she went! Today she tried to take off her pants and when I asked her what she was doing, she said, "I go potty! Diaper off!" She sat there on the potty for a while, so finally, I left her on her little potty while I went to get a diaper, and she came running out of the bathroom yelling, "I tee-teed in potty!" Sure enough, she had! We had to tell everyone. When we called my grandma so Olivia could tell her, Olivia held the phone up right above her potty, pointing to it and yelling, "See? Look! Tee-tee in potty. See it?"

I'm not going to get really serious about it until after Christmas because we're out a lot, but I think she's more than ready!