Teatopia

Thanks!!!

Thank you so much for your feedback. I think I'm going to take a middle ground approach. I'll continue with my normal routine like it's a very normal thing. Nursing at 13 months? No big deal. When Olivia points at my boobs and yells "boof!" (used to be boo-boo, now she says "boof") I'll go quietly to our room and nurse her. And if we're somewhere I can't have privacy, I'll be ready with a cover. If they ask (which they inevitably will), I'll explain that I believe nursing is healthy and that Olivia isn't ready to wean. There. Now why was I so worried? (the answer is because I feel the need to please everyone) I wish I had more confidence in myself and my decisions. Your reassurance really helps a lot. Thanks. :-)

I just love talking to all of you. This blog is such an important part of my life. I know support and advice are always available through this blog, and I am so thankful for that. You all rock!

Well, I'm off to read before bed. I STILL have a little left of "The Power of One" and I am determined to finish by the weekend. I haven't taken this long to read a book in 15 years! I've been reading most nights, but I fall asleep so quickly lately. I have about 10 books lined up to read next, and I'm also helping start a book club within my moms' group, so I've got to get this book done. BTW, has anyone read "Memoirs of a Boy Soldier" or "A Thousand Splendid Suns"? Those are 2 on my list.

It shouldn't matter what anyone thinks... but it does

I'm what you could call a reluctant lactivist. I am passionate about breastfeeding and its benefits, but I'm not pushy about it like some women are. I don't feel the need to preach about it all the time. It really is a personal decision, even though I believe it's the best way to go if you are able.

I used to be proud to share that I nurse, and while I guess I still am, I'm not as forthcoming about it as I was before Olivia turned a year old. I think the general thinking of most people is that you stop around a year, if you even nursed at all to begin with. Because Olivia doesn't nurse as often, I don't do it as much around other people, so there are many friends and family who probably don't know I still do. And it's not like I wouldn't tell them if they asked, I just don't advertise it because I feel like I have to follow up with an explanation when I admit that, yes, I'm still nursing.

It's not even like I think 13 months is very old. It isn't at all! I wish I didn't feel the need to justify my choice with things like, "the doctor encouraged me to continue" and "there are many continued health benefits" or "it helps allergies". Blah blah blah. I could probably talk until I'm blue in the face and it would still seem weird to some people. It's too bad, really. Our society doesn't support nursing like it should.

I know there are people close to me who think it's a bit odd, like my mother-in-law. She's awesome and we get along really well, but I know she thinks it's weird. She encouraged me to give Olivia milk when she was here in November. Afterall, she gave her kids whole milk around 6 months, and so did my mom because that's what doctors said back then. I explained that I wanted to nurse a full year, but I could tell she thought it was a little strange. Although to her credit, I don't even know if strange is the right word. Maybe unnessecary is a better word. She didn't think I needed to nurse that long.

So the other night, James was telling her a few things to buy for Olivia to have when we go there in a week. He told her to buy whole milk because Olivia does drink maybe 4 ounces a day (that might be a stretch-- it's more for things like making mashed potatoes). Anyway, she said something about Olivia now being on whole milk, and James told her that I also nurse Olivia. She said, "I would've weaned her immediately at a year. It's time to stop." But she wasn't as abrupt as it may sound, but I know she thought it was weird. Then James said something about, "well, she hardly nurses at all anymore. Just at night" which isn't even true. She nurses 4-5 times in a 24 hour period. Not too often, but more than just at night.

There are 2 ways to play this during the trip. I could 1) not mention it and do it in private while not sticking up for my choice (and supporting breastfeeding women everywhere), or 2) tell them, explain my decision, and try to convince them I'm right so they aren't judging me.

James doesn't think it's important to tell them, but I don't want to hide either. I'm not ashamed, but I'm not so proud as to cause an akward situation either. Sometimes I wish I was more of a lactivist, not an obnoxious one, just someone who avidly supports breastfeeding and tries to educate people about its benefits. There are many wonderful reasons to nurse past a year, besides the fact that your child isn't weaning very well. Frankly, I haven't even tried.

I hate that people look at extended breastfeeders as weirdos. I'm not weird. I have a very healthy, happy child whose never even had an ear infection (although I know many breastfed babies who have, so I'm not saying it's because I nurse-- I think Olivia has just been lucky).

I could go overboard and order pro-breastfeeding attire for all! :-)

for me:

for Olivia (it says "nursling"):

and maybe even something for James!

But seriously, I'm just not sure how to act. Do I hide it? Do I come right out and defend it? How do I handle James who'd probably rather I pretended I didn't nurse for the week. He supports nursing, but he's rather quiet and really doesn't care who else supports it.

I just hate that I'm in this position. I wish the automatic response when hearing a 13 month old is nursing could be "good for you!" rather than, "really? WHY?"

The American Academy of Pediatrics says this: "Breastfeeding should be continued for AT LEAST the first year of life and beyond for as long as mutually desired by mother and child."

I hate conroversey! I hate that it's so hard for me to defend myself and say what I really think aside from on this stupid blog!

**Just to clarify, I would NEVER buy any offensive clothes promoting breastfeeding. While I think it's important, many of them seem a bit obnoxious and pushy. I was just joking. :)**

Noodle Puppets and more

We've been busy the last several days. Lots of exercising, good food, and visiting with family. My aunt and uncle (my mom's bro) are visiting, which is always fun. My aunt has been a member of the same book club for at least a decade, and I always know I'll be reading good books after she leaves. She always has the best recommendations. Today, all the girls went for tea! We had so many yummy sandwiches and sweets. I forgot to take pictures because I couldn't stop stuffing my mouth. Thank goodness for those 4 miles I power walked yesterday! If it wasn't for the HORRIBLE air quality from all the fires in GA, I'd be out working my rear some more. Seriously though, the air is smokey and stinky, and we're 200 miles away from the fires!

With James on break from school, we've been cooking up some yummy things, like baked tilapia with a tropical salsa:

Healthy veggie sandwiches for me:

Last night, we enoyed some not-so-healthy food at Olivia Garden. Olivia had a blast. She's been really into finger puppets lately, and last night, she took a big tube shaped noodle and put it on her little finger and waved it around at everyone. She made it say "hi" to all of us, using this high voice like I use. My mom's a drama teacher and thought it was quite brilliant that Olivia understood the concept of creating a character.

She's learning so much everyday. Her vocabulary is probably around 35 words. Her newest ones are "juice", "poo-poo" (which she says during diaper changes), "apple" and people's names. We're teaching her to say the names of James's family members so she knows them when we go up in a couple weeks. She says "pop pop" and for Missy, "ees ees". She's so much fun! She's still not walking independently though, which worries me a little even though I tell myself I shouldn't. Sometimes I worry she's not balancing herself well. I have a friend whose son has balancing issues, but I keep hoping she's just not ready to walk and will be fine when she's ready. She took a few steps last week, so I know she can do it. I'm not going to rush her, so we'll wait and see.

I've been a slacker in the picture department, so here are some newer ones.

Going for ice cream has become a hot weather evening favorite! We get the free kiddie cone for Olivia, and (somewhat) healthy sugar free shakes for us. Trying to lose weight SUCKS!

She's been doing this a lot lately. She even walks like this sometimes, on all fours like a primate. It's so funny. Maybe this is a step closer to walking??

Hmmm... I think maybe it's time to pack this thing up! The weight limit is 20 pounds and we're just about there. I've been wondering, where do you all change your bigger babies (bigger being too big for a pack 'n play changing table)?? We don't have a changing table. I do have the dresser with space for the pad, but I have things on it. I suppose I should clear it off. I guess I could use the bed. What do you use?

I hope you're all having a great Memorial Day weekend. I plan on making green tea ice cream for Monday. I'm sure Olivia will LOVE that! What are your plans? Well, we're off to buy diapers and prunes (what a combo). I think Olivia has been eating too much cheese. I've noticed she's been straining a lot. I hope I don't end up with the opposite problem now!

My favorite shows ever

Lately, I've been watching the complete series of various shows, both old and new. Of course, it's taking me time (usually when Olivia is napping on me). We have Netflix (love it!) and I've been picking a show and watching all the epiodes-- mostly shows that have already ended. The one I'm in the middle of now was one of my favorites as a young teen, "Road to Avonlea", or "Avonlea" as it was called on the Disney Channel here. The show originally aired in Canada. I love this show! It's so innocent... graceful, simple, funny, and gentile.. none of that cheating, divorce, sexpot crap that I watch on more current shows (which I admit, is also v. interesting). I think this has got to be my favorite series ever. With that said, I want to know your top 3 favorite series ever.

I'd say mine are:

1. ROAD TO AVONLEA

2. SIX FEET UNDER

3. GREY'S ANATOMY

but not far behind are "Sex and the City" which I put off watching for so long because I thought it was too dirty, but when I gave in (thanks, R) I found it wasn't so bad and really pretty funny. I also love "Nip/Tuck" but it's become a little too off the wall for me. I'm sure there are more, but I can't think of them. I have a baby girl pulling on my foot.

Time to run. I've got food pics to post later, but until then, what are your 3 favorite shows, ever? Maybe there's something I'm missing. After I finish this series (when Netflix decides to carry the 7th season), I don't have anything lined up. *sniff*

Nip/Tuck

I was reading an interesting conversation on a blog the other day. The blogger mentioned that she was thinking about getting implants, and the next thing I read, many bloggers got all worked up, accusing her of being vain and too much into appearances. Some said they were dissapointed in her. The whole thing surprised me. I figured people were more relaxed about it these days. There were some who supported her choice. A mom in my moms' group got gorgeous new boobs a few weeks back, and the attitude of most moms seemed to be, "good for you!" I know in our society, many people (like stars) take it a bit too far, focusing entirely too much on their image and causing many women to have unhealthy feelings abou the way they look.

Personally, I don't have a problem with plastic surgery to a degree. I think if you can afford it and it makes you feel better, go for it. I fully intend to have a tummy tuck when I'm done having kids. James and I have already talked about it, and he says we'll take out a loan if need be. I don't consider myself a vain person. I doubt I'd ever have a face lift or lypo, but I don't like the way my clothes fit now, and having extra skin there makes it tough. I also know no matter how much I work out, it's here to stay. And I'm sure, after 1 or 2 more babies, it'll only get worse. So yes, I plan to have plastic surgery someday. But I don't look at it as enhancing myself, I just want to get back to the way I was.

But what about people who probably look fine to the rest of us? What about wanting bigger boobs? Or fatter lips? Or a less wrinkled forehead?

I'm curious, what are your views on plastic surgery? Is it vain and a waste of money that could be better spent, or do you believe it's great if it makes someone feel better? Where do you draw the line?

So, if you're all for plastic surgery, what would you be most likely to get? Anything bothering you? If money wasn't an object, how would you change yourself?

Mole

Two entries in one day? Well, after my depressing last entry, I had to make it a bit more upbeat. Also, this is too cute and I'm worried I'll forget to share it because I'm brain dead these days. Afterall, I have a kid who just cut two molars. Wait, I forgot to tell you that! Well now you know. Needless to say, we haven't been getting much sleep.

Olivia has her first mole. It's a tiny one on her knee. I made such a big deal over how cute it is, that she keeps pointing to it and saying, "mo". She's also had a good time finding little freckles and moles on us. The kid's obsessed. She's been showing everyone we meet her little mole. I love this age. Every little thing is so exciting!

Now go down and read my last entry. What do I do about my friend?

Choices Parents Make

As much I am ashamed to admit it, before I had Olivia, I was more likely to give to an animal charity than one that helps children. I had a bigger heart for animals because I had no children and only dogs. When Hurricane Katrina devestated New Orleans, I wept more over lost pets and homeless animals than I probably did for the children. I shutter to think about it. It's not that animals aren't important-- of course they are worth weeping over, but in the scheme of things, people certainly matter more. I suppose I couldn't relate to the heartache of losing a child, but I knew how I'd feel if something were to happen to my precious dogs. Now, there's no question. I still care about dogs, but if a child is in trouble, I can't stand it. I think all moms are like this, because we wonder, "what if...?"

I am forever shocked my the choices that some parents make. We are all different, and I realize we all parent differently, which is wonderful when those differences come from this core belief: that we are doing what we think is best. I am always pleased to learn something from a friend who parents differently from me. My ways are not always right. I felt I needed to say that, because there's always some condescending commenter who feels the need to criticize and what I'm going to say might provide an opportunity. Like last time, when I wrote about how dirty some kids in my moms' group are, someone felt the need to say "but God loves them". Yes, he does, but that's not exactly the point I was making. Did that need to be said? I know God loves them, and thank goodness He does because it doesn't seem as if their parents are trying all that hard.

I posted several weeks back about the new friend I made while walking and how comfortable I felt with her. I'll admit, I'm not as drawn to her now that I know her, and the way she treats her child is just awful. He's not even 1 and she tells him to "shut up" in a mean voice, and when he wants to be picked up, she yells, "get off of me!" She doesn't feed him enough, and I've tried to help without completely sticking my nose in, but I also don't want to stand by and do nothing. I don't think it's bad enough to report, but it's still quite shocking. She's had a bad life, and at first, I made excuses for her, saying that she just didn't know better and that it was sad. But I think any parent with an ounce of sense knows to feed their child more than every 6-8 hours. Come on! He's not skinny or anything, which surprises me, but she admits she's not good about feeding him! She has money to smoke, but not for formula. And she won't join WIC because she doesn't want to rely on the govt, which I respect, but I think most (and hopefully all) taxpayers wouldn't mind supplying her helpless baby with milk. She's fine with mooching off me and a few other friends. There are several people who have been really kind about helping her. I just don't understand what's wrong with people!!!!

Just this last week, a mother was arrested in my town for leaving two young children unattended in a poop-infested trailer. The kids were filthy. Everytime I hear stories like this, I think about friends who desperately want children who would make wonderful parents. I had a co-worker friend who just adopted a beautiful baby girl. She used to look at some of our students and comment how unfair it was that their parents didn't take care of them. She wanted kids badly and would've done a wonderful job. I'm so glad she has that chance now.

Then there's the current story about the missing little girl. Quite frankly, I'm not sure why parents would leave three toddlers unattended in a hotel room in a foreign country to go out to dinner with friends. We all make mistakes, but that's just crazy. I am so worried the child won't be found alive. The reward is so big that if she were, surely someone would've returned her to claim it. I can't imagine how those parents must feel with their child missing.

I know we all make mistakes as parents. I'm definitely still learning! There are things I do that I want to kick myself for: thinking Olivia couldn't roll far enough to go off the bed, cutting her finger when clipping her nails, getting soap in her eyes. And I know I'll make far worse mistakes. These things happen. But it's the gross cases of neglect that have me wondering, what goes through these parents' minds? And don't tell me they don't know any better. No one thinks it's ok to let kids play in poop. How can parents look into the eyes of their children and not want to do everything possible to make them happy?

So I think I've covered all the bases. I'm not perfect. I screw up. We all are different. Different is good. Neglect is bad. I'm not trying to judge. I'm just expressing heartache over these situations.

News Flash!

Guess who took her first few unasssited steps last night? :-)

I don't think she'll be taking off on her own quite yet, but we are so proud she's starting to try! :-)

Hellllooooooo out there

Lordy, Lordy! Am I so boring? Is anyone still reading?

I guess I shouldn't worry because I read blogs all the time and don't comment. It used to be because I nursed while I read, now it's because I read in bed with my laptop when James and Olivia go to bed, and it bothers James when I type. I really need to set aside time when I am free to read and respond. I miss my blogging time. :-(

I really need to update my blogroll, so if you read me and I don't have you on my blogroll, please leave your blog addy in the comments so I can add you. I am SO behind in updating my list.

Hey- those of you in GA-- Airtran has a deal right now that ends tomorrow at midnight: Atlanta to many different cities starting at $39. We got tickets to go see James' family for about $200 for all of us! Yay!!! I really want to buy Olivia a little suitcase. This is her 4th trip and I've really wanted one for a while. Which is the cutest?

This one from Sanrio. I loved Sanrio when I was a kid!

This one:

I'm a long-time fan of Pooh. This one is cute too:

James says that Olivia doesn't need her own suitcase, but we always bring enough to take up our own entire suitcase, so it's only fair that Olivia has her own too. Is it a silly idea?

7 random facts about me

Jessica tagged me. :-)

1. I am obsessed with all things South Africa. It is the most beautiful country I've ever seen (and I've traveled a lot). I felt a strong connection with it and it "spoke" to me. If I don't go back someday I'll die.

2. When I was in college, there was a teacher who hit on me every single class. He used to hand me little notes telling me how hot I was. I never reported him because I was too scared.

3. Before James, I dated this guy for over 3 years and I still don't know why. He ran hot and cold and was so moody. I think I must've enjoyed the challenge. He was unattainable.

4. I think I am mildly OCD. If I break a nail, I have to immediately cut the rest of them so they are all the same length.

5. I like to have my feet tickled. I bribe James with all kinds of things so he'll tickle my feet.

6. I've had surgery 4 times.

7. I have 200 varieties of tea in my tea chest.

I'm tagging Rebecca!

Could I be any luckier?

Today, on the second Mother's Day, I am feeling so lucky. I am so proud of the little family James and I have created. Today was such a special day: dinner at Carraba's, two lovely cards that made me cry, presents, and two trips to Starbucks. Yes, that's how spioled I am. James took me to Starbucks two different times today! Once in the morning and once this evening.

We didn't go to church this morning because I've had a nasty cold and didn't get much sleep last night. So we enjoyed a lazy morning of pancakes and playing.

Olivia was such a good helper this morning. She gathered dirty clothes off the floor, opened the hall closet, and pulled herself up on her tiptoes so she could put the clothes in the hamper. She left the socks though so she could try them all on, but when she couldn't get them on her feet, she decided to put them in the hamper as well. She also has started blowing on her food like she sees us do when it's hot. She picks up something, blows on it, and then pops it in her mouth! She imitates everything we do. She brings me so much joy. She makes me laugh, cry, and want to thank God constantly for this blessing. I love being a Mommy! WEEEEEE!!!!!!!

Here she is trying to clip her own toenails:

trying to drink from a water bottle like us:

Trying to put on socks (pardon the quality, I snapped this while I was in camcorder mode):

baby must-haves

I posted a list of my current favorite things to use for Olivia. Come on over and take a look. Then, you can share yours!

Thong advice

Lucky you. You get to help me shop for undies!!!! (I know you're so excited!!!)

Here's my situation. I've always worn regular underwear, preferably the cotton ones at VS. But then someone recently suggested I try a thong. I've tried one before, but only the ones that come with lingerie, but considering the situation, it didn't stay on too long. But I can say in those few minutes, having something up my crack felt kind of nasty. So, I'm wondering, have you ever worn a thong? If so, did you get used to that awful feeling?

And my biggest worry: are thongs only for skinny girls? What about girls with a few extra pounds (but I'm not plus-sized or anything)!

It would be easy to just buy what I'm used to, but my hips are so wide that my regular undies don't always cover my whole butt. I have true post-preggo hip spread. I weigh less than I did before!!!!

*I'll have to close this post soon because the spammers are going to LOVE IT! A$$holes.

Busy Weekend!

**UPDATED: HAIR PICS and more**

Whew! We were busy this weekend! We had a family reunion on Saturday for my dad's side (mnostly relatives I don't know), then a retirement party that night for a family friend, and then yesterday we went to Montgomery, AL to look for things for my parents new house. Poor Olivia is so tired! (not to mention me, but my sleeping needs have taken a back seat)

Olivia has become much harder to go places with because she's so much more independent and wants to do what she wants. She's into everything (although she's been doing that since she's been crawling) but now, it's harder to control her because she gets mad. She's so funny though and I love watching her grow into a little girl instead of just a baby.

Although we usually read to her, she enjoys reading to herself, too:

She's still completely obsessed with brushing her own teeth:

and the dog's, which she has done several times now:

Even her little body is looking less like that of a baby. She's thinned out (although the top of her thighs are still kissably fat).

I've actually been a little worried that she's gone from being pleasantly plump to quite tall and thin, but she eats well (some table food, some jarred food, and lots of nursing!) The doctor isn't worried, so I shouldn't be either.

I have more pictures to post (hair pics! I took some!) and others ,but she is yelling and pulling at my shirt. She's exhausted from this weekend and has been fussy ALL day. Please check back later. I'll add them to this entry.

Edited to add:

The results of the hair dye are in! I certainly didn't end up with the light brown the box said I'd have, so now I look like a Pamela Anders@n wanna-be!

Olivia's new favorite game: peeka-boo in the car! She pulls the blanket over her head, and waits for me to ask, "Where's Olivia?" and then she pulls off the blanket and squeals. She started doing this a few months ago, but now she's into it hardcore and we play it everytime I'm in the backseat with her!

Where's Olivia? You can see her chubby little hands holding up the blanket all on her own.

She's always so excited when she pulls off the blanket and I make a fuss over seeing her! So precious!

A message from Ray Charles...

Ray Charles would like to wish you a Happy Friday!

National Day of Prayer

Today is the National Day of Prayer. Just wanted to tell you all how much I love and appreciate you, and that I'll be saying a special prayer for you all today.

Take some time today to thank God for his blessings! :-)

"If my people... will humble themselves and pray" II Chronicles 7:14

Check, check!

Tonight my mom came over for a while to hang out with Olivia, and I got some things done. I used to hate cleaning, but now I love it. It relaxes me and gives me this huge sense of accomplishment!

Tonight, I...

~ mopped the kitchen foor
~ mopped both bathroom floors
~ did laundry
~ baked homemade yeast rolls (the dough was made in my new breadmaker!)
~ make a roast in the crockpot (but that was started earlier today)
~ vacuumed

It feels so good to check things off my never-ending list! James will have a break soon, and then only 2 more months of grad school, so soon I'll no longer be a single parent, because that's what it's felt like. It's hard on both of us.

Tomorrow morning, I've got stroller exercise, which I co-host with MF 3 days a week. I volunteered to be one of the organizers because I knew it would make me go to all of them! James and I are talking about baby #2 and I'm no where near my goal weight. I at least want to tone my belly, although I think some of it's just loose skin. James said that we'll get me a tummy tuck after I finish having babies. I wouldn't have any other plastic surgery, but I would have excess skin cut off for sure! I also have pilates tomorrow night, which I love. Although it hurts, I like feeling my abs burn the next day because it means it's working!

James got me a cute tote bag to carry my mat. I really want my own ball because I hate sitting on one that someone sat on with their sweaty butt, but it's too big to carry to class! I just bought some new yoga pants last week, so I'm one stylish chic!

Well, off to read more of "The Power of One" and hopefully finish it soon! I haven't taken this long to read a book in years! And I have like 8 more I am dying to read!